Recognising coercive control
4-minute read
Coercive control is a pattern of behaviour that makes someone feel dependent, isolated or afraid. In England and Wales it has been a criminal offence since 2015. It often builds slowly, which is why it can be so hard to see while you’re in it.
Some common signs
- Checking your phone, messages or where you’ve been
- Controlling money, or making you account for what you spend
- Cutting you off from friends or family, or making contact feel like trouble
- Criticising how you look, dress or behave until you doubt yourself
- Rules that keep changing, so you’re never sure what will cause an argument
- Threats, including threats to leave, to hurt themselves, or to tell others things about you
If this sounds familiar
It is not your fault, and you’re not overreacting. You deserve support whether you’ve left, are thinking about leaving, or aren’t sure what you want yet.
If you’re in danger, call 999. If you can’t speak, call 999 and press 55 when prompted. The National Domestic Abuse Helpline is free, confidential and open 24 hours on 0808 2000 247. The Men’s Advice Line is 0808 801 0327.
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